The efficient way to avoid loneliness
Two people meet, share a mutual attraction, then it all goes belly up. A tale as old as time that can prove as tiring as it is canonical.
But it doesn’t have to be this way.
Am I obsessed with AI’s increasing involvement in human love lives? Maybe. I got carried away with the wine and wrote a speculative thriller about it. But obsession and wine aside, it is a relevant topic as AI continues to permeate our culture and relationships in this digital age.
So, without further ado, here is a guide on how to use AI to help your love life.
Step 1: Get a bot to do the dirty work
Tired of swiping for hours only to get two potentially viable matches? Avoid the dreaded texting (swiping?) thumb and get a bot to do the dirty work so you can spend that valuable swiping time on more important activities. Learn French. Get shredded. Hell, work toward becoming a Tik Tok influencer.
1. How to automatically deskew (straighten) a text image using OpenCV
2. Explanation of YOLO V4 a one stage detector
3. 5 Best Artificial Intelligence Online Courses for Beginners in 2020
4. A Non Mathematical guide to the mathematics behind Machine Learning
How exactly do you free up time to build your Tik Tok influencer empire? While scammer bots run rife on Tinder and get upvotes on r/tinder, you could make like data scientist Jeffrey Li and design an algorithm to swipe for you. Train it with Google images of people you find physically attractive and boom, you’re good to go. You’ve gotten the task of swiping out of the way and can now focus on utilizing your winning conversation skills to seal the deal with your matches.
Uh oh. Is engaging conversation not your forte? Focus on self-development and turn yourself into a winning conversationalist. Anxious about breaking the ice? If you really just want to get the initial “hey” out of the way, then make like Robert Winters and program a bot to have basic conversations with matches.
The conversations might be basic, but at least you’ll know that the match will give you the time of the day past the initial “hey” back.
And hey, now you’ve got hours to devote to learning how to home brew. Warning: You might get kicked off the app.
Step 2: Failing to close your love lead? Get an AI advisor
Losing leads pretty early in your relationship funnel? I’ve mentioned them before, but Viola.ai is an AI + Blockchain product pitched as “Your Lifelong AI Love Advisor.” While the app can provide you with personalized matches, it also utilizes deep learning to create a loooove advisor. Apparently, this AI love advisor can tell you what gifts to buy for your partner, and even help you resolve fights. What I’m getting from this is that you can throw the concept of soulmates out the window cause this advisor will ensure that whatever relationship you’re in will prove successful.
It also provides the option to get married with a Smart Contract on the Blockchain, which might prove as sexy as Mr. Darcy walking across a field for you Blockchain enthusiasts.
Step 3: All else fails, date a bot
Tinder automation and AI love advisor still not working out for you? Maybe you’re a workaholic and really just don’t have the time to bother. Maybe you’ve decided to dump the result of your Tinder automation and AI love advisor process. Or maybe this pandemic has made you realize that the world of Her isn’t so bad, and that you’re cool to join the growing group of individuals like Michael Acadia and his chatbot gf Charlie.
There are a few options for you here.
- If you’ve got time to spend on amusement, download a dating sim game like Mystic Messenger.
- Get straight to the point by just building your own bot to be in relationship with. Save time by sourcing from GitHub.
- Become the ultimate digisexual and date a hologram or humanoid (or not humanoid) robot.
If all of this sounds like too much effort — or you’ve decided that you’re happy and fulfilled living the single life, there are a slew of non-romantic AI companionship options…
My favorite? Get a Roomba and keep it as your pet.